Bleh.

I'm tired today. I'm at the beginning of my weekend (as in, my days off), and it's hard, because I just want to relax. But I also want to spend some quality time with Owen, and he totally wants to hang out and play with me. But I also have a ton of shit I need to do. It's that stupid bitch, MOM GUILT, getting to me again.

I decided it was time to go back to school and finally finish. So right now I have an online class, then at the end of June, I start a 5 week French class. Let's just say, this is not going to be easy.

How do moms do it? I feel bad when I'm on the computer and Owen needs my attention. I feel bad when I have to leave him for work. What is it going to be like when I have to leave him for school, then leave him for work, then ignore him when I am home, because I have homework?

I know he's young and probably won't remember any of it, but I will. And I know it is only going to be for less than a year, but that's a whole year of my son's life that I won't really be around for. I know it is so that I can provide for a better future, but what about the present?

Ugh. I think I'm just too tired today. And if I'm too tired for me, then I'm too tired for him. I feel like an asshole.

Let's just say, thank God for coffee.